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CRESPOGRAM REPORT

AUGUST 26, 2013

TROLLING FOR VOTES

THESE ARE THE NUBILE, YOUNG CAMPAIGN VOLUNTEERS THAT WERE USED AS THE CENTERPIECE OF THE SUAREZ CAMPAIGN’S STRATEGY TO GET YOUNG VOTERS - PREDOMINATELY YOUNG MEN - TO SIGN UP FOR ABSENTEE BALLOTS AT THE BRICKELL CINCO DE MAYO STREET FAIR THAT LED TO THE FIASCO RESULTING IN HIS COUSIN AND CAMPAIGN MANAGER STEVE SUAREZ AND HIS CAMPAIGN OPERATIONS MANAGER, JUAN PABLO BAGGINI HAVING TO PLEAD TO A MISDEMEANOR LAST WEEK.


CLEARLY THE SUAREZ CAMP FIGURED THAT BEER AND A COUPLE SEXY YOUNG WOMEN WAS THE BEST WAY TO LURE GULLIBLE YOUNG MEN INTO APPLYING FOR ABSENTEE BALLOTS, AND IT PRETTY MUCH SUMS UP THE FRAT HOUSE MENTALITY AND HIS EFFORTS TO PANDER TO YOUNG PEOPLE IN HIS RACE FOR MAYOR.


WHILE SUAREZ CONTINUES TO CLAIM THAT HE WILL RESIGN AS CITY COMMISSIONER ON TUESDAY SO THAT THE ELECTION FOR HIS VACATED SEAT WILL TAKE PLACE IN NOVEMBER, RUMORS ARE NOW CIRCULATING THAT HE WILL NOT DO SO, BUT INSTEAD WILL PROVIDE AN INTERESTING REASON FOR WHY HE WILL WITHDRAW FROM THE RACE FOR MAYOR.


LIKE I SAY, IT’S ONLY A RUMOR NOW, SO WE’LL HAVE TO WAIT TO SEE WHETHER SUAREZ SUBMITS A RESIGNATION LETTER WITH A DATE CERTAIN OF SEPTEMBER 5TH, AND THEN HONORS THAT LETTER, OR WHETHER THIS TURNS OUT TO BE THE LATEST TWIST IN A CAMPAIGN THAT DESERVES TO BE PUT OUT OF ITS MISERY ASAP!

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